When it comes to one night stands or casual sex, men are known to be more interested the women. In my opinion, social stigma is very biased against sexually active women. It seems unfair that when words like promiscuous and slutty come up we almost always think of women. What is with the misconception involving guys enjoying sex more? It’s so hard for society even to this day to accept the fact that yes women can have NSA healthy sexual lifestyles. Why are we the ones that are suppose to alway say no? I find it amusing that the way we speak or dress is blamed for why a guy came on to us inappropriately. Not saying that this is always the case, but you and I both know that it happens way too frequently. Personally, I think women can have casual sex as many times as they want, as long they aren’t hurting anybody including themselves. I understand that other modest individuals have their view and i respect that. But why is it so hard for society to leave those who choose to live a lifestyle like this alone? What’s so wrong with it? Call me biased, but I’m more of a believer of this concept probably because i have experienced the stigma myself. After I had done the deed for the first time (which led to my first love: coming soon) I realized that I actually enjoyed it and wondered why there was so much stigma around it. Many would say that I did it for the wrong reason; curiosity. I started believing what people said about me for a little while. But then I thought to myself, they don’t get to tell me what the right and wrong reasons are for engaging in this activity. Everybody is different, they have different reasons. Personally, I find it less exciting being in a monogamous relationship. Anyway, if you’ve gone to high school you know that when there are eyes on you, everything you do spreads around campus like wildfire. My peers were comparing to the so called “sluts” of the grade who were guys. They were saying things like ” Why does she act and talk like a guy when it comes to sex?”. It would aggravate me, because who ever decided that those type of actions are something straightly correlated to guys. I’m a very open minded female who chooses to be sexually active, maybe at a younger age than most but that does not make me a bad person. It just makes me someone who engages in activities I enjoy. Maybe its okay to consider sex as an activity, i’m not saying sleep around every weekend, but maybe having more than one partner who engages in this with you is not so bad. If some people are lucky enough to find this connection or spark with somebody sexually, i say go for it. Others have trouble finding even a single partner, while the opportunity is on the table, explore and have a good time. Make sure both you and your partner are on the same boat with the situation because you don’t wanna end up getting hurt, or worse, hurting somebody else. All because they misinterpreted your actions. At the end of the day do what makes YOU happy, I can’t stress that enough. Trying to please other people and creating an image of you that society finds acceptable is a waste of time. You look back later in life and think about all the memories you could have made if only you went another path. Stop pleasing others and start doing what makes you feel like a ray of sunshine… even if there is a stigma around it.
People scapegoat and blame others for their downfalls in life. They try to rationalize to themselves how other individuals are the main reason they did the bad things that they did. They cut you off from their lives because you’re “not good for them”. You look back at all the times they claimed to have been peer pressured and you soon realize that this friendship may not have ended for the right reasons but it sure as hell good that it did. They try to rationalize their actions by correlating it to every single aspect of your life that they think is negative. But when you start thinking about what they said you think to yourself, wait her situation and mine are not the same. I didn’t do the exact same that she did. Ya maybe I messed up sometimes, I am not perfect ,but I learned to prioritize those who were important in my life. Manipulating and deceiving people for a long time is very sinister. The worst part about all of it, is that they make you love them. You fall for it and wish that you could despise them. You can’t because when they showed their true colours and left, they took a part of your heart and left you hurting. Don’t be so naive when it comes to people. These times make you realize that you don’t actually trust anybody. I wish that feeling for no one, it’s quite heartbreaking actually. You’re on your own because all these people you call your friends or best friends don’t know anything about you. They think they do, but in reality your the only one that really knows you . Every relationship you’ll have will end doesn’t matter when, how or where.. it’ll end. It’s so hard trusting new people that come in to your life because the wounds left by those who have wronged you in the past does not ever seem to fully heal. At the end of the day it seems people will put themselves ahead of you and they make excuse for it. You try to relate to others but they don’t even give you the chance to do so, because of some social stigma that seems to be be attached to you. A stigma that was based on rumours and lies. Everybody in this generation is so judgemental and easily fooled that trying to establish a genuine relationship is nearly impossible. You shouldn’t be sitting in your room crying alone on a Friday night but you are, and maybe it’s for the best, because your so called friends will use your weaknesses (that you told them about in confidence) against you at some point. Maybe if you let no one in for a little bit your wounds will start healing. They say only time will heal but why do i feel like i’ll always be wounded, vulnerable and alone.